Right from when you were a child, you were probably taught to avoid negative emotions no matter what. But they don’t tell you that life is no bed of roses. It gets messy and painful. Living through emotional abuse can be one of the most traumatic experiences, and yes, many come out of it with lasting emotional scars. But it’s important to allow yourself to deal with what you’re going through and heal from it all. It is important to remind yourself that no bad feeling lasts forever, and you too deserve a life of happiness.
Here’s why it’s important for you to heal from emotional abuse:
1. To break free from the cycle of repeating toxic patterns
When you stop yourself from healing or try to suppress your feelings, it can take a toll on you emotionally. And being emotionally weak can make you vulnerable to getting stuck into the cycle of emotional abuse. You could get sucked into the same pattern of manipulation and toxic behavior again.
When you finally identify what’s causing the pain, and realize what you can do to stop it, taking those first few steps towards healing can be difficult, but also very necessary. You will only come out stronger, and the next time, you’re able to fight harder when someone tries to invade your boundaries.
2. For a self-esteem that will return, making you stronger than before
Going through the suffering of an emotionally abusive relationship can leave your self-esteem crushed. You may be feeling despirited, and possibly even stopped believing in yourself and started wondering if you really even deserve happiness. But you do.
When you start recognizing all the negative things that the emotional abuse had convinced you of, it becomes easier to regain your inner strength. And once your self-esteem starts coming back, you realize that every lie in the relationship was told to weaken you. As you start understanding how much you’re worth, you will never again allow someone to convince you otherwise.
3. To empty the pain in your heart, and make space for growth
On some nights, you still lie awake in bed, feeling like there’s a heavy weight on your chest. Your heart is still carrying those emotions of anger, sadness, fear and grief. But once you empty your heart and move past all those emotions, you start making space for more love in your life.
You finally learn to love yourself again, and that empowers you to keep going. You turn into someone who is so emotionally strong, and others can’t help but feel drawn to your presence. They manage to slowly fill your life with more of the love you deserve.
4. To finally understand that you’re not the one to blame
You may still be hurting because you never stopped blaming yourself. Being in the company of an emotional abuser may have convinced you that you were always the one to blame. But as you heal, you realize that it was no fault of yours. All you did was give someone a chance, and now you will never make the mistake of giving that chance to the wrong person. Finally accepting that it’s not your blame to carry will give you the freedom you need to chase after what’s best for you.
5. You don’t want your past stopping you from happiness
Not allowing yourself to heal will keep you trapped in the same suffering. Don’t let yourself turn numb, where your mind refuses to process what is happening. When you let yourself heal, you will find that there’s no pain that lasts forever and there’s no pain you can’t heal from. At the end of emotional trauma, your heart will slowly move towards being filled with joy. You start beaming with happiness and you thrive. You are no longer numb to the joys of living and your life is filled with meaning again.
6. Because you want to heal for the sake of your sanity
It’s tough to heal when the reality of what happened is hard to digest. Don’t hold yourself back due to what went wrong in the relationship. It happened, and it’s over. But don’t try to bury your feelings and hope that they will stop haunting you. An emotional abuser can make you feel like you’re the one who’s crazy or has issues. Trust in your loved ones and get help, so that you can make yourself a commitment – to heal no matter what it takes. It’s what you need to feel sane again. It may take some time, you may even falter, but there will come a time when you will finally feel like yourself again, and decide who is worth your company and who is not.
7. You don’t want to pass on the same misery to your kids
When you step into the shoes of a parent, you realize that you have to be strong not just for yourself, but for your children as well. You know that your children will pick up so much from you. And you want them to learn the best things. What you hope your children will understand is that life won’t always go their way, and you hope they remember how their parent was able to make it through the most difficult situations so that they will have the courage to do the same. You want to show them that not everyone they meet will be worth trusting, and they should never let anyone disrespect their physical and emotional needs.
8. You’re ready to start a brand new chapter in your life
Taking the journey towards healing yourself will finally let you put those bad memories to rest. You will realize that one bad chapter doesn’t ruin the entire story. That one relationship doesn’t define who you are and what you deserve. You let it rest with your past, not ignoring it or burying it, but having learned from it and moved on. And that lets you start a brand new chapter in your life, filled with happiness, remarkable memories and all the love that you deserve.