He’s the man you fell madly in love with. You felt the spark early on, right from those very first romantic dates. He made you feel special in a way that you never felt. But he’s also the man you eventually leave. They say love is not enough and it makes perfect sense to you now. That intense connection brought you two together, but it’s not enough when you have to keep giving up your needs for him. When you see that your partner puts you through these things and is unwilling to compromise, that’s when you know you have to leave the man you love:
1. He gives excuses rather than his time
He might be the man who made you fall head over heels for his romantic side, but as time passed, you realized that he’s not the man you can depend on. He may say one thing and do another. He may promise to show up but he always has an excuse to give right up his sleeve. He might have kept you waiting more often than you expected, but you’re done giving him more chances than he deserved.
2. He takes your space away from you
Trust is what every relationship is built upon, and if you’re ready to put your trust in him you can expect the same back. You deserve a healthy amount of space without him trying to intrude and taking over that space. And that means being able to spend time with your friends when you want to or being by yourself when you’re craving some alone time. But if he can’t let you do that without scrolling through your phone or keeping tabs on you or asking you dozens of questions, then you don’t have to put up with a man who can’t trust you.
3. He is physically there, not emotionally
Being there is not enough. His physical presence doesn’t matter if he can’t pay attention to the little things that are important to you. Having dinner with you isn’t as important as him being your emotional support, a rock you can always lean on. But what’s more is that he stops himself from leaning on you as well. If he’s closed off and can’t show you his vulnerable side, he’s not strong enough to get in touch with his emotions. So he bottles it all up instead.
4. He doesn’t give as much as he takes
Of course, you would do anything for the man you love. You’re willing to go the extra mile and do whatever it takes if it means making him happy. And when you need the same, the man who loves you would do it for you. But if your partner keeps taking away from, pushing you to the point of sacrificing your thoughts and feelings at every step, it could push you overboard. You might love him but it doesn’t mean you have to lose yourself along the way.
5. He tried to change you instead of accepting you
From making you feel beautiful to making you feel loved, he did it all. But it was only a matter of time before he started trying to change little things about you. A real man would be able to see that it’s both your strengths and weaknesses, your gifts and flaws that complete you. They make you human, they define you as a woman. And breaking you apart and trying to put you back together to fit his own definition of ‘perfect’ makes him shallow and undeserving of you.
6. He’s too weak to be upfront with you
You don’t want to know every single detail about his life, because you maintain a certain bit of privacy yourself. But being overly secretive or lying to you to cover up his tracks is something you don’t have to put up with. Being in love doesn’t make you blind to his manipulative behavior. You know you deserve a man who will keep it real with you. If he truly loved you, you wouldn’t have to question or doubt it; he will show it to you himself through kindness, honesty, and simple gestures.
7. He started projecting his insecurities on you
Looks can be deceiving and this was the relationship that proved it to you. On the outside, he may be a strong, confident man who is in touch with his feelings. But on the inside, he is emotionally weak and deals with a fragile ego. But rather than dealing with emotions in a healthy way, or letting you in on his deepest fears, he lets his fears boil inside and they eventually come out on you. If he can’t be true to the woman he loves, then he can’t be true to himself either.
8. He always makes it about himself and never about you
Sometimes you may find that you’re apologizing even when you don’t actually feel sorry. The arguments may have increased and the bitterness is growing because somehow he manages to make everything about himself. You feel like you’re losing your ground in the relationship, trying to do whatever it takes to please him. But nothing deserves having to give up your desires, dignity, and self-worth for someone, not even love. When you finally find that loving and equally healthy relationship you deserve, you will never have to put yourself through this kind of turmoil.