In a society where a high value is placed on relationships, you constantly catch yourself wondering why you are single or are never able to hold on to a relationship. Is it because you are not pretty enough or funny enough? Or is it something about you that turns men away from you? Is it because you spend too much time with your dogs or girls or it is because you like to trek every weekend. With every relationship you get into that breaks up, somehow there’s always a new reason added to the dreaded ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ line. But as it turns out, it has nothing to do with how you’re not good enough, it has to do with the fact that you’re perfect the way you are. You have the double whammy qualities of being beautiful and smart which is why you are single most of the time. It sounds sketchy, doesn’t it? But it’s true and here are 6 reasons why.
1. Your standards are very high
You didn’t go through 4 years of college to get a degree and 40 hours a week to support yourself financially only to get into a relationship with a guy who doesn’t even appreciate you. You’re not looking for someone whose IQ is off the charts or gets constantly called on by scouting agents for a modeling career. You are just looking for someone who will see that you are accomplished on your own and appreciate and be proud of what you have achieved. Unfortunately, the guys who are like that are either married, gay or taken. So you’re on your own most of the time.
2. You love being independent
You hate feeling dependent on someone just because they are your partner. You have worked hard for your independence and you bring that into a relationship with the expectation that he will understand that there are some things that just need to be done by you alone. Having gained true independence by learning to save money, feed yourself, take care of work, find time to hang out with friends and still have time for yourself, you don’t like the idea of having a guy who thinks that you should spend all of your time with him or taking care of him. After all, you’re dating him, not raising him. Not to mention, even physical labor is not an issue for you anymore. If there is something you can’t lift or do, just one call and you have someone on your doorstep ready to fix your problem.
3. Most men feel intimidated by you
It’s not because you are cold or mean that they are intimidated. Most men just think that if you’re beautiful and smart, you’re taken. They fear being rejected so they avoid striking up a conversation with you. Nobody likes the feeling of being turned down. Since you’re already doing so much by yourself in your life, you’re too tired to take the first step. Even the most independent woman will want someone to care for her, even if it’s just for a little while. But you come across some men who seemed to like you until you started saying something clever. Then they backed out and that may be because they don’t like the fact that a woman has better qualifications than he does.
4. You’re not looking to fill a void
Despite wanting to find a guy who will appreciate your brains and make you feel loved, you’re not actively looking for it. That’s because it’s not killing you that you don’t have a partner. You are quite satisfied with the way your life is already going. You could have gotten a promotion at work or be having a ladies weekend out with your friends every few weeks. You have a family to spend time with and you are taking care of yourself quite well. You don’t actually need a partner to make you feel complete, you would just like to find one who is capable of loving you for your brains and the beauty you know you have.
5. You’re more emotionally stable
Women are supposed to be these creatures who cry or become emotional at the drop of a hat. When in a relationship, this could either cause them to be dependent on their partner or could turn off their partner. But that’s not the case with most women anymore and that includes you. You are a lot stronger and capable of handling any obstacles lobbed in your court. Since the modern world is giving women more opportunities to be at par with the men, let’s just say that men aren’t really thrilled with that idea. If you have a better job or better education than the guy who wants to go out with you, if they respect your abilities, then the relationship might be worth it. But if he constantly expresses that you don’t need a job or that you won’t be able to handle something, then it’s best to say goodbye to him. It doesn’t bother you to stay single.
6. You’re not easily attracted to the fairytale love
You find that whole fairytale love overrated and unrealistic. No man and woman have never had fights before and lived happily ever after. In fact, it’s a sign of trouble if the man and woman don’t fight and still stay together because it means that they aren’t communicating properly with each other. You are romantic enough to want the flowers and the random hugs but you are also realistic enough to know that one kiss isn’t going to solve anything and singing certainly isn’t going to melt the problems away. Of course, you probably trust people less because that’s the reality of how many people treat their relationships and you’ve definitely had your heartbreaks. Besides, you have more important priorities to take care of so you don’t have time to deal with a fairytale.
Being beautiful and smart doesn’t always have its perks but you own it because you know that you need to feel good about yourself. You don’t require a man to make you feel good but it would be nice to have a partner who would occasionally treat you like a princess, a modern one who has to work during the day and take care of everything else during the night. But for now, enjoy being single and yourself because soon enough, there will be that one guy who is attracted to everything about you and truly loves you for you.